Always Let Thank-You’s Be Thank-You’s And Apologies Be Apologies.

They Did Remember Me Asking This Question; But Did Not Know What I Meant By It, And They Ranted And Raved About Not Being As Smart As Me With ALL These New-Fangled Gadgets.  This Probably Came Across More Like An Accusation, “So This Compounded The Problem.  Now, I’ve Offended Him Twice. 

And Then I Said, “I Thought You Were Joking, If I Had Known That You Were Serious, I Would Not Have Put In The DVD”.  I Wanted To Say, “Well, Why Didn’t You Speak Up”, But That Might Be Going Too Far, If The Peer Pressure Was That Strong, Then Perhaps He Didn’t Feel That He Could Have Spoken Up, or That We’d Honor Him.  He Was Taking Offense.  When You Take Offense You’re Not Being Thankful, And You Get Deceived, (Romans 1:21).  True Love Always Believes The Best Of Others, (1 Corinthians 13:4-8); And Would Say, “It Was Probably Not Your Intentions To Offend Me, But My Feelings Got Hurt”, And Then Offer Them A Way To Save Face, A Way Out.

In The Amplified Bible Classic Edition Says It Well ~

Let No Foul or Polluting Language, Nor Evil Word Nor Unwholesome or Worthless Talk [Ever] Come Out Of Your ‘Mouth’, But Only Such [Speech] As Is Good And Beneficial To The Spiritual Progress Of Others, As Is Fitting To The Need And The Occasion, That It May Be A Blessing And Give Grace (Yahweh’s Favor) To Those Who Hear It, (Ephesians 4:29).

insecurity Is Also Another Selfish Spirit Working Behind The Scenes, That Was Probably The One Offering Him The “Get Offended” Bait.

The Scriptures Tell Us In Philippians 2:3-4 ³ “Let Nothing Be Done Through Strife or Vainglory; But In Lowliness Of Mind Let Each Esteem Other Better Than Themselves. ⁴ Look Not Every Person On His Own Things, But Every Person Also On The Things Of Others”.

If You Add Anything At ALL To An Apology, (Such As, “I Apologize, But It’s My Irish Temper, or It’s That Time Of The Month, or We Were Busy”, “I Was Misinformed”), Then You’re Putting The Blame On Someone Else, And It’s Worse When You Say, “But, You Just Get Me So Mad”, Because Now, It’s Their Fault That They Were Mistreated.  Oops.  You Might As Well Say, “Well, I Apologize But It Was Not My Fault, Because The Light Bulb Burned Out In My Refrigerator And I Had To Go Home And Change It”.

This Retail Store Trained Me.  Consistently For Nine Months, I Was The Highest Thank-You Sender And Also The Highest Repeat Business, And Also My Sales Manager Noted In Meetings That There Were A Lot Of Customers Commenting About My Thank-You Cards, And Had Me Address The Sales Force Twice.

Never Once Is It Appropriate To Say Anything In A Thank-You Other Than Thank-You; or To Offer A Rationalization As To Why You Did What You Did In An Apology. If You’re Apologizing, That Means You’re Taking The Blame.  So, Take ALL The Blame For Their Sakes, (Unless You’ll Be Sent To Jail For A Crime You Didn‘t Do).  Oftentimes, Weeks, Months or Years Later They’ll Come Back And Tell You They Were Partly To Blame, But Even If They Don’t Come To You; Accept Full Responsibility Because In Their Eyes They Are So Consumed That You Are Wrong, And The Perceived Cause Of Their Problems Already. They Are Being Held Captive In Their Minds. You Have The Power To Release Them From This Bondage.

The Scriptures Tell Us In Philippians 2:3-4 ³ “Let Nothing Be Done Through Strife or Vainglory; But In Lowliness Of Mind Let Each Esteem Other Better Than Themselves. ⁴ Look Not Every Man On His Own Things, But Every Person Also On The Things Of Others”.

Here Is The Road Map To Success From The Scriptures
2 Timothy 2:24-26

²⁴ The Lord’s Servant Must Not Quarrel, But Be Gentle Towards All, Able To Teach, Patient,
²⁵ In Gentleness Correcting Those Who Oppose Him: Perhaps God May Give Them Repentance Leading To A Full Knowledge Of The Truth,
²⁶ And They May Recover Themselves Out Of The Devil’s Snare, Having Been Taken Captive By Him To His Will.

Perhaps, You Think Of Yourself As Being A Sales Friend And Giving Them Some Insider Trading Information On UpComing Sales.  However, Don’t Write or Say, “Thanks For Dropping By.  It Was So Very Pleasant To See You And Your Husband So-n-So.  I Know It Would Be Just Even More Pleasing To See Your Husband Reclining By The Sofa Listening To The New Triple X-Plus Receiver That Goes On Sale For Only One Day Only Next Friday.  These Will Go Quick, And I’d Hate To See You Miss Out On Such A Great Opportunity.  Hope To See You There~!  7 AM Sharp, Come Early As We Only Have A Few In Stock~!”

After A Few Days Past When You Think That They’ve Gotten The Thank-You Note You Might Want To Write or Call Them And Just Let Them Know About A Sale, But Even Then Be Quick And Exit Early.  You’re Just Informing Them.  If They Come In, Then Demonstrate The Features, Benefits And Advantages Of The Product.

Otherwise, No, Not Even Once Is It Okay To Add Anything Other Than, “Thanks” To The “Thank-You” Card~!  It Is Not Okay~!  However, Take Notes As Soon As They Leave.  Get Their Names And Write Them Down As Soon As They Are Out Of Your Sight, Watch What They Are Interested In And Make Your Thank-You Replete With These Resplendent Details Referring To Their Names or Specific Things They Enjoyed.  Don‘t Use Big Words As I Just Did To Just To Give You An Example Of What Not To Do, or Talk Over Their Heads With Technical Jargon.  Make Your Sentences “Chalk-Full” Of Their Local Colloquialisms, (Slang).  Also, Include, “Birthday Cards”, “Sympathy Cards”, “Get Well Cards”.  Let Your Motives Be Pure And Your Cards Reflect That.  If You Only Want To Send Them A, “Birthday Card”, So That They Will Remember You, Then Don‘t Send That Card.

Write Your Thank-You Card As Soon As They Leave If You Have Time, or Schedule It For The End Of Every Day At A Certain Appointed Time Referring To Your Notes About Them.  Get Your Notes, And Write The Thank-You Card, And Send It Right Away.  Don’t Wait A Day or So To Write It, or You’ll Forget Because You Have A Lot Other Customers In Between.

How Would You Rate The “Thank-You” That You Have Sent?

Did It Meet The “Let Your Thank-You’s Be Just Thank-You’s” or Were There Other Potential ‘Barbs’ In There?  Did You Show That You Appreciate Them As A Person?  Could He or She Detect That You DeValued Their Pajama Bottoms Choice or Gift Choosing Ability For The Ninth Year In A Row?, (They Can Read Between The Lines If You Say Something Smart Aleck Like, “I’ll Add This To The Other Pajama Bottoms That You Sent Last Year, And The Year Before That…”; You’ve Just Made The Thank-You Not Only Worthless, But Started A Reason For Them To Be Offended).

You Have To Guard Your Heart, Not Your ‘Mouth’ .  “For Out Of The Abundance Of The Heart, The ‘Mouth’ Speaks”, (Matthew 12:33-34; Luke 6:45).  Honor Could Have Been Missing In Regards To These Matters, And It Will Show Up On In The Way You Express Yourself.  Get Your Heart Right About Them First, Make Sure You’re Walking In Love And The Speech or Text Will Follow Appropriately.

I Think You Did Fair In The Restaurant With Them Ignoring You For 10+ Minutes…

The Scriptures Say In Ephesians 4:15:

Instead, Speaking The Truth In Love, We Will Grow To Become In Every Respect The Mature Body Of Him Who Is The Head, That Is, Christ. You Can’t Just Speak The Truth, (For The Letter Of The Law Kills, (2 Corinthians 3:6).  However, You Can’t Just Give Them Grace Without Speaking The Truth In Love or They Also Want Grow Up Into Christ~!

So, It Sounds Like You Spoke The Truth In Love, because You Left A 22% Tip… … A Noteworthy Act Of Yahweh’s Graciousness.

Perhaps, They’ve Had A Day Where Nobody Even Notices Them, And Treats Them Like They Are The Hired Help…

They Are The Hired Help… (Luke 17:7-8), (Bonus Luke 17:3-4). However, You Want To Be Gracious. You Are The Person That Can Make, {or Break}, Their Day. They Are Looking To You, {And Others}, For their Self-Esteem.

Real Love Doesn’t Want Anything In Return, (Do I Have To Tell You That This Is (1 Corinthians 13:4-5).  LOL?

The Only Thing That I Think Could Have Been Done Better Next Time Is To Talk To The Person In Person, That Did This To You, *(Matthew 18:15). I Sense That You Don’t Like Confrontations… However, If You Ignore This Incident, Then They Won’t Grow And They’ll Do This Again To Someone Else. And Here Are The Instructions From The Head Of The Church, (The Boss Man, Hint: It Is Probably Written In Red In Your Bible).

If Your Brother or Sister Sins, Go And Point Out Their Fault, Just Between The Two Of You. If They Listen To You, You Have Won Them Over, (Matthew 18:15).

And If You Just Leave Them A Note To Read Later, Then They Just Got Burned, And Are Probably Thinking, (The Nerve Of That Lady)…Most Folks Are Not Doing Stuff Wrong On Purpose. They Don’t Know That What They Are Doing Is Inappropriate And Will Only See Your Note On The Receipt As A One Way Conversation And Cruel Where They Have No Place For A Rebuttable To Defend Themselves.

But, If You Talk To Them In Person With The Mindset That Love Never Fails And That You Will Win Them Over, Then You’re Not Thinking Confrontation. But, If You Go Into The Conversation With The Attitude That This Was Poor Customer Service, Then That Will Prevail In Your Talk. Perhaps, They Just Don’t Know.

So, You Should Begin Your Conversation With, "I Know That You Didn’t Mean To Offend Us When We Came In When We Were Ignored For 10+ Minutes While We Stood To Be Seated…

Then Ask A Question as Questions Can Diffuse The Pointing Finger, (Isaiah 58:9).  … Ask Them How Would You Like To Increase Your Tips?  If They Say, Yes, You Now Have Permission To Speak Into Their Life. "I Am Going To Give You A Tip On How To Really Increase Your Tips… When You See A Customer Come In, Immediately Treat Them With Honor And Say To Them, Something Along The Lines Of I’ll Be With You In Just One Minute, I Need To Seat These Customers And I’ll Come Right Back".  Don’t Ever Leave The Customers You’re With To Help Another Customer, But Do Acknowledge Them. That Reminds Me, Always Tell The Customer What You Can Do And Not What You Cannot Do.  Say To Them “If You’ll Add These Things Into Your Skill Set” And Add, “Your Tips Will Go Up~!”

This Gives The Opportunity For The Young Person, (I Think They Might Be Young From What You Described)… To Come Back And To Find A Way Out.  It Gives Them Grace, (You’re Not Backing Them In A Corner, Where They Are Going To Feel Defensive).

They Will Probably Come Back With Some Lame Excuse Why They Couldn’t Help You, (Oh, I Thought Y’all Were Making A Documentary Since You Were Filming It Or The Light Bulb In The Refrigerator Keeps Going Out When I Shut The Door And I Had To Go Home And Change It~!)… You Give Them Grace And Latitude, not Attitude.  Say, I Can Understand Why You Thought That.  They Heard You, No Need To Rub Their Faces In It.  Scold A Dog With A Newspaper And He’ll Still Be Your Friend For Life.  Scold A Cat With A Newspaper And You’ve Lost A Friend.

Correct With Positive Reinforcements, (Again Ephesians 4:15 Comes To Mind) But Also Ephesians 4:29 …

Let No Foul or Polluting Language, Nor Evil Word Nor Unwholesome or Worthless Talk [Ever] Come Out Of Your ‘Mouth’, But Only Such [Speech] As Is Good And Beneficial To The Spiritual Progress Of Others, As Is Fitting To The Need And The Occasion, That It May Be A Blessing And Give Grace (Yahweh’s Favor) To Those Who Hear It, (Ephesians 4:29).

Now, Is Not The Time To Scold Them… Remember, You Are Speaking The Truth In Love. Now, Is Not The Time To Say, Once You Realized That You Might Get A Tip From Us, You Then Started Being Nice To Us.

Editor’s Notes: It Is Probably Better To Say Negative Things In The Air So That They’ll Disappear, And Put Down On Paper The High Words Of Affirmation That You Want Them To Rehearse In Their Minds Over And Over Again, Unless You’re Giving Them A Performance Review At Work Where There Are Specific Things You Want Them To Address And Correct.  But, That’s In A Relationship Where You’re An Authority In Their Lives And Not Considered At Equals.  Even So, Fathers And Mothers Have Greater Consideration For Your Sons And Daughters Than To Publish In Print Criticisms Of Them.  See Gary Smalley’s Book On, “The Language Of Love”, (You Can Often Buy The First Edition For One Cent With The Total Price Of $4.00).

I Recommend Reading Both “The Language Of Love” By Gary Smalley & John Trent And
Gary Chapman’s Book Called, “The Five Languages Of Love”.

You May Not See Anything Wrong With What You Wrote, So Please Consider This.  Allow Someone That Has A Different Personality Than You To Read Over Your Thank-You’s Before You Send Them. 

 

P.S. Never Send A Thank-You Note On Email.  Anything That You Want To Encourage Someone With Is Worth Spending The Time, (Even If You Have To Make Time, And Get Up Earlier In The Morning) And The Money To Buy A Real Card For.  Something They Can Have And To Hold, (It Will Mean More In The Days, Weeks, Months, And Years To Come).  After They Have Received The Card, Then You Can Reiterate The Thank-You In The Email, Perhaps Describing How You Found The Gift Useful or Their Thoughtfulness And Use Specific Detail Showing How You Felt Like That They Were Thoughtful.  Real Words That Folks Will Ponder Over And Over Again Belong In Writing~!